Although to thee thou wouldst that life is lost;
Declaim the shame of all that it contains;
My love doth live in this thou wouldst accost;
Yet see how free her innocence remains.
I would that shouldst thou know thine eyes may trust,
That she as thee such trial here sustains;
Though long hath life to her so dealt unjust;
Yet still she will her innocence remains.
I pity thee if still thou canst not see,
The difference from thy sameness she attains;
Though lost, thy life the same, my love is free;
Through this abyss, her innocence remains.
So deep the sweetness still thy soul contains,
I pray this day thine innocence remains.
This sonnet is part of a short sequence: click here to read it all:
David Emeron: Sonnets 
This is so beautiful. You offer not just cautions but hope. Lovely.
I think this entire series has a nice cadence to it when read aloud. I don’t have the correct words to express what I speak of but the rhyme scheme and the way the sounds repeat give a pleasing gigue to the pieces.
Is this correct? Compound triple rhythms? Or am I hearing something that isn’t there?
Now that I look over the piece again I can see that I am indeed dreaming. There is no triple rhythm herein. Ah, I will have to sleep, my dear, and look again when I awake.
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There are internal rhymes, mostly in the even numbered lines, although this is not homogeneous. There are alliterative elements in line three of each quatrain, and sometimes in line one–mostly on the letter “L.” And as per my usual, the ending couplet is a compressed version of the quatrains.
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Thank you!
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And compound rhythms, yes, but nothing more complex than four on two.
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You just do that so well! :D Good thing I don’t attempt sonnets, but only love to read them… LOL. I’d injure mine badly.. :D
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They are not so very difficult. I am sure yours would be quite lovely, judging from your other work. Many of the forms you will see here are of my own devising, But you will see also more well known forms here as well.
Perhaps begin with a Shakespearean : ) they are the simplest with no perpetual rhymes. (ABAB, CDCD, EFEF, DD)
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I seem to remember a funny little exchange in one of the Chronicles of Narnia about assonance and alliteration (“don’t ask him what an assy-thingummy is; he’s only longing to be asked!” or something like that)…yet more evidence of how evocative a particular way of using words can be, in addition to their defined meanings. Thanks for prodding the brain! ;)
Kathryn
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